Tags
some of us have roast beast,
some of us have egg nog,
some of us have mistletoe and holly.
i have
luce irigaray and the speculum of
the other woman.
29 Sunday Dec 2013
Posted in All
Tags
some of us have roast beast,
some of us have egg nog,
some of us have mistletoe and holly.
i have
luce irigaray and the speculum of
the other woman.
Put me down for two or twenty also. I might hand them out as intoudoctrry gifts to perspective dates for my daughters. Maybe the addition of a shotgun graphic would be nice. Maybe just for the teen set. Although, it would make a classy addition to the diaper covers.Girl, this post was snort inducing. Since you already aren’t very busy, consider starting The Vagina Blogs with me. My stories plus your creative language would kill. Think off (off) broadway. Maybe down a dark alley.But you might not want to sign that contract after I buzz kill you with some reassurance. Speculums are used all over the medical field. For example, there is one they stick up your nose. And that disposable tips on the end of an otoscope? Also a speculum. Points to ponder if you are ever in the ER for jellybean-up-the nose removal or an ear infection.Still giggling over in trouble with more than just the fashion police.
I have two boys, so thankfully, speculum isn’t in our vocabulary. But, I’m half-heartedly trying to teach my oldest, who’s 6, the proper words for the male anatomy. So he’s heard penis, testicles, you know, THOSE words…But, as an example about how it can go SO wrong, here’s my conversation with him the other day:A: Mom, S kicked me in the nuts!Me: We don’t use that word. If you’re not going to use the correct word, don’t say anything.A: Mom, S kicked me in the tentacles!A few days later:Me: Stop rocking the recliner all crazy. What is wrong?!A: I can’t help it! My tentacles hurt!And believe it when I tell you, he stares at Squidward when he sees him on Spongebob with a VERY concerned face…I am both a gatekeeper AND a bad influence, and promptly Facebook it ALL. So go ahead, have some Italian in the DA-JI-NA whenever you can! It’s all good!